SINCE.life

Dear Soul…

Being a human is hard. There are so many things we want to know, so many questions we want to be answered. We say we need to live our life to the fullest, but we can barely remember most days that are passing by, we consciously refuse to change it and instead we sabotage ourselves by the things that cause nothing but harm.
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We need to understand (or at least try to) the realities of others and their perception of life, yet we force our beliefs system onto the world, when we are not even sure if we truly believe in it. But we want to believe in it so badly that we shut down and separate ourselves from others in order to avoid any conflict. We scream about collective consciousness, but by the end of the day, during this most advanced and comfortable age, we still remain absolutely alone and not able to ask for help even when we truly need it.
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We want to believe that better things will appear with time, but time is cruel and unforgiving and the only thing we see it’s an aging person starring back at us from the mirror.
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We lie that our life is under control, instead we lose the grasp of it too damn often, and we still fight so desperately to get the desirable controller back into our hands.. We trust the illusion of control so much that we ignore those constant slaps in the face that the Universe gives us.
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We make mistakes… Oh, Soul, we make so many of them… And, even though, it’s a great opportunity to learn from it, we learn absolutely nothing and do that again.. and again.. and again….
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Our priorities are all mixed up, and we lose faith so often.. We count our good deeds religiously, even when we have no proof that this will ever benefit our souls and /or the Great Spirit.. Although, we can probably agree that good deeds do count.
“So do We count it or not? “ desperately screams the impatient public – “I have some time tomorrow between 12 and 1pm. I can use it to do something nice for society” – decisively agrees someone. Sad, but true.
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We run around “building” our successful and financially “stable” lives in order to peacefully rest during our retirement.. Will we make it?.. And we need a lot of rest, since our insanely packed and busy schedule prevent us from actually living.
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We have to make sure that our kids/pets/parents are not neglected, that we participate in our marriage. However, sex is all it takes today when it comes to couples, since communication is replaced by the interaction with the phone, family meals hold no value “you eat when you can”, romantic dates became overrated… Such commitments are not that exciting anymore and to make it exciting again is challenging, it takes time and effort, and we can’t afford wasting that time because time is MONEY!!
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And we have to admit that sometimes we even question the existence of that Higher force, especially, when life gets extremely hard, because how come that someone who loves us unconditionally will ever let something so horrible happen to us? Or may be that’s exactly what You (Soul) want to know about our human existence? May be, you (Soul) want to experience the depth of the life’s terror in order to experience the beauty and purity of Spirit? Maybe be, it is only the dream that we all refer to as life and one day we will wake up and see the meaning in it?..
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We must believe in it.. There is no other way.. And that’s the only thing that people should ever be fighting for; FAITH.. That this too, shall pass, and that the answers will be given one day, at the right time. And everyone’s time of discovery will be different; tomorrow or in 4-6-100 years, we all will find THE truth. The only ONE truth…
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But for now, please, Soul.. comfort me when I need help and when I fall asleep.. Protect me, so that my faith remains strong and untouchable. And let it grow bigger so that I get to share it with others who needs it as much as I did in life. Give me clarity to follow the path of goodness even when temptations are so damn strong, but also let me safely and harmlessly try all of them as well, so that I get to experience it together with you.
Life is just that… Ultimate and ever changing paradox..”
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And, I love you!